


Attention, Mr Sorcerer Supreme!

by Lailyn



Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Adventure, Boys Being Boys, Crack Treated Seriously, Established Relationship, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Humor, Loki (Marvel) Does What He Wants, M/M, Magical Boys, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, You Know There Will Be Angst Later
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-07
Updated: 2020-01-07
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:48:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22154305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lailyn/pseuds/Lailyn
Summary: A bored Loki is a dangerous Loki. Wong takes one for the team.
Relationships: Loki & Wong (Marvel), Loki/Stephen Strange
Comments: 3
Kudos: 57





	Attention, Mr Sorcerer Supreme!

“Stephen.”

“Hmm.”

“Stephen.”

“Hmm.”

“Strange!”

“What?”

“I’m bored.” Loki flung the book across the room, only for The Cloak to catch it in mid-air; Loki bared his teeth at the sentient piece of cloth as the relic did the equivalent of waggling a chastising finger at him. “Let’s do something.”

“Like what?” Stephen murmured. “A quickie?”

Loki made a face. “I’m still sore from this morning.”

Stephen stared. Loki waved his concern away. “I am _ancient_ , Strange. Surely you’d expect a little dryness once in a while.”

Stephen laughed silently. Somehow he found the idea of a post-menopausal Loki ludicrous and utterly hilarious. “Poor you.”

“Your sympathy is overwhelming.” Loki pinned him down with eyes deader than doornails.

“As is your incessant clamouring for entertainment.” Stephen finally looked up from his book. “I am _busy.”_

“Too busy for me?” Loki asked quietly.

“Don’t pull that with me, mister.”

“You won’t like me when I’m bored…” Loki said in a warning tone.

Stephen rolled his eyes. “If it isn’t sex you’re looking for, could you please go be bored somewhere else?”

“Fine.” Loki stormed his way out of the room. “I’ll get out of your perfectly moussed hair and murder a homeless person or two! Maybe then I’ll get some attention!”

“From the police? You can bet your sweet ass you will,” Stephen muttered.

* * *

“Wong.”

Wong barely looked up from his bowl of instant noodles at their resident royal freeloader. “S’up.”

“I’m bored.”

“Aren’t we all.”

“You have to help me.” Wong suspected there was desperation somewhere, if Loki’s tone had not been so commanding. He only snorted, which was a mistake, for suddenly there was hot, briny broth in his nose –

Loki stared as his boyfriend’s best friend and sidekick as he coughed and choked and coughed some more.

Instead of helping by thumping the poor fellow on the back or doing something equally unhelpful, Loki reiterated, obviously oblivious to Wong’s predicament. “You have to help me.”

“Why?” Wong rasped.

Loki blinked owlishly as if Wong had said something extremely stupid. _Isn’t it obvious?_

“It is for the greater good,” Loki said slowly. Warningly.

Suddenly awareness and wariness mixed with a healthy dose of horror jolted Wong awake and breathing through his nose again.

“I am not sleeping with you, Loki,” Wong said, his voice jacked up in volume and pitch in his hysterics. Where was Stephen when you needed him? Obviously not around if Loki was here, looking for _entertainment_ –

Loki’s mouth fell open. Then a sly glint replaced the confused look in his eyes. He tilted his head coquettishly. “Why not?”

“It’s – it’s –” Wong stuttered. “It’s not in the roommate agreement!”

“What isn’t?” Loki asked innocently.

“That I should c-cover for Strange should he be indisposed,” Wong sputtered, trying to come across resolute and strong.

Loki pouted. “He’s not indisposed. He’s just busy. You’re not.”

“I’m busy too! See?” Wong cracked his chopsticks against the side of his ceramic bowl. “Hafta eat it while it’s hot! Ehehe…he…he.”

Loki gave a loud, exaggerated sigh. “I guess you’re right.”

But he planted his ass on the dining table anyway, all tight leather and trim gluteals on show. “What would you suggest I do to pass the time?”

“Golf?” Wong squeaked. “There’s a driving range near here. Here, I’ll give you a free coupon I’ve got for a golf cart hire –”

“I only ever golf because Stephen likes how my ass looks,” Loki said glumly. “Apparently I have the most perfect golf stance, and when I swing, he says his world sha –”

“Okay, _okay!”_ Wong yelled, holding his palms to his ears, chopsticks and all.

Loki only looked at him, all-forlorn-eyed and miserable.

“I’ll help you,” Wong growled. “But can you at least wait until I finish my lunch?”

Loki’s eyes lit up. With a touch of seidr, he pushed the bowl smack into Wong’s chest, jostling it and spilling some of the precious broth. “Chop, chop, Wong!”

* * *

“How the hell did we end up here?” Wong squinted, flabbergasted at the sight awaiting them upon stepping out of the portal.

“I may…have tinkered with the GPS on your portal a little bit.”

“Loki!”

“What? You were going to take me to Ellis Island to see the Statue of Liberty! I’m not a bloody tourist.”

“You said to take you somewhere interesting,” Wong said defensively.

"I said surprise me," Loki grumbled. "Stephen always takes me somewhere unexpected." He glared, "I thought you said you'd be more entertaining."

"I never said that." Wong stared. "And you will not goad me into some kind of twisted competition between me and your b-bedfellow." 

Loki only smiled a slow, soft smile, that for all its gentleness only screamed 'Are you sure about that?' all the louder.

"The only thing that would have made Lady Liberty the slightest bit interesting is if you had all agreed with Thomas Edison back when he had plans to make the statue talk."

"That's...kind of creepy."

"And Edison's dead, so. Moot point." Loki looked at him sympathetically. "You need to do better from now on, Wong."

“It’s on the list of Top 10 Things to Do in New York!”

“Says who?”

“Tripadvisor,” Wong said triumphantly.

“Right.” Loki gave his boyfriend’s best friend a pitying sidelong glance. “You should have said you wanted to go. There is no need for all this subterfuge.”

“So…if I said I wanted to go back, you’d take me back?” Like Wong had any problem with just leaving Loki to his own devices. Scratch that. _Major_ problem.

“Sure,” Loki shrugged. Then his smirk turned evil. “In an alternate reality.”

“I am the Guardian of Sanctum Sanctorum, protector against all things metaphysically bad and evil. And I am babysitting my Sorcerer Supreme’s high-maintenance sort-of, on-again-off-again boyfriend,” Wong said flatly. “I _am_ in an alternate reality.”

“Well, have you ever seen the water look this good?”

“Yes, yes, it’s all very nice, but what are we doing _here?”_ It was getting harder and harder to keep the frustration out of his voice. Wong had no idea how Strange did it. “And why are you dressed like _that?”_

“And why am I dressed like this?!” Wong wailed.

“Aww. It looks good on you.”

“It doesn’t!” Wong pinched his love handles. “Is it supposed to be this tight?”

“Goodness, Wong. One might think you’ve never worn a wetsuit in your life.”

“And what makes you think I ever had a reason to?”

Loki sighed exasperatedly. “Some exercise would do you good, Wong. I watched you fight the Mindless Ones the other day and…well, you’re getting pretty slow if you ask me.”

“Excuse me?” Wong balked.

“I thought Stephen was supposed to be the doctor around here,” Loki muttered. “Here. Wear these.” A pair of polarised shades appeared out of thin air and wrapped themselves around Wong’s head.

“A little sun screen –” A glob of white goo smeared itself all over Wong’s face like icing on a cake. “And you’re good to go!”

“Go. Where.” Wong’s heart pounded loudly in his ears. “Swimming?” He knew he was sounding more hysterical by the second, “Are there sharks here?”

“Of course there are.” Loki was already walking towards the water. “This is Maui.”

_“Maui?”_

“It’s one of the top kiteboarding spots close enough that Stephen wouldn’t raise the Amber alert on you if I didn’t return you promptly,” Loki said coolly.

“Wait. You are planning to return me. Aren’t you?”

Loki did not answer. An aura of magic encircled him as he cast a protection spell against the heat and the sun, and unlike Wong, who was already sweating buckets, Loki looked as cool as a cucumber as he smiled that infuriatingly sly smile while gathering his hair and bunching it up into a ponytail.

“Can’t you at least equip me with one of those magnetic shark repellent bracelets or something?” Wong tried again, despite knowing how futile it was.

“You don’t need that, Wong,” Loki’s voice was lost to the wind as he started to jog, “All you need is wind and water!!!”

“I look like an idiot,” Wong muttered. “And that looks _hard.”_

And in a matter of heartbeats, Loki was kiteboarding down the coastline, all sleek and graceful and spraying water everywhere, “If it were easy, everyone would do it! _Whooo-HOOOOO!!!”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a fun piece to tide me over the next few days - weeks before I go back to doing some serious writing. Originally posted to my [Tumblr](https://finnlaily.tumblr.com), and edited for AO3. I like the idea of Loki being chummy with Wong.


End file.
